No One Has to Die Alone
Preparing for a Meaningful Death
Foreword by: Jean Watson
Caring for a terminally ill loved one can be the single biggest challenge of your life. Drawing from her experience sitting with over 500 people as they died and caring for her own terminally ill father, Dr. Lani Leary gently guides caregivers, family, and friends through the difficult transitions of illness, death, and bereavement.
No One Has to Die Alone offers the practical skills, vocabulary, and insights needed to truly address the needs of a dying loved one while caring for yourself through the process. Dr. Leary shows both patient and caregiver how to rise above feelings of fear and isolation to find peace and meaning in each person’s unique end-of-life experience.
Whether used as a reference book to address a particular challenge or read from start to finish, this is a must-read for anyone facing death or the loss of a loved one. You’ll learn:
• how to listen to and support a loved one’s needs;
• what to expect as a loved one declines and the different grieving processes and tasks;
• the key to supporting a grieving child;
• what resources are available for patients and caregivers;
• the lessons of near-death experiences and the value of after-death communications.
No One Has to Die Alone offers the practical skills, vocabulary, and insights needed to truly address the needs of a dying loved one while caring for yourself through the process. Dr. Leary shows both patient and caregiver how to rise above feelings of fear and isolation to find peace and meaning in each person’s unique end-of-life experience.
Whether used as a reference book to address a particular challenge or read from start to finish, this is a must-read for anyone facing death or the loss of a loved one. You’ll learn:
• how to listen to and support a loved one’s needs;
• what to expect as a loved one declines and the different grieving processes and tasks;
• the key to supporting a grieving child;
• what resources are available for patients and caregivers;
• the lessons of near-death experiences and the value of after-death communications.
Choose a format:
Buy from us:
- Atria Books/Beyond Words |
- 272 pages |
- ISBN 9781582703527 |
- April 2012
Buy from another retailer:
Praise
“Publisher's Weekly Review: Leary, a psychotherapist and professor of death studies, has written an extraordinarily clear-eyed and helpful guide for those who must care for a dying loved one, an almost unavoidable and challenging situation. Leary brings both the personal experience of her parents’ deaths--two very different situations at different times in her life”
– as well as two and a half decades’ professional experience working with the dying and the bereaved. Caregivers almost always begin the journey of caregiving not knowing what to do or say; Leary offers both information and comfort for them. Half t
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“Publisher's Weekly Review: Leary, a psychotherapist and professor of death studies, has written an extraordinarily clear-eyed and helpful guide for those who must care for a dying loved one, an almost unavoidable and challenging situation. Leary brings both the personal experience of her parents’ deaths--two very different situations at different times in her life”– as well as two and a half decades’ professional experience working with the dying and the bereaved. Caregivers almost always begin the journey of caregiving not knowing what to do or say; Leary offers both information and comfort for them. Half t
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“Anyone who is forced to deal with a dying loved one or who is mourning one who has died will profit greatly from reading this seminal manual of Dr. Lani Leary’s. No One Has to Die Alone is not only full of the most helpful practical advice and counsel, but is informed by the author’s luminous spiritual perspective, which makes this a book of wisdom for the living as well. ”– Kenneth Ring, PhD, author of Lessons from the Light, professor Emeritus of Psychology, University of Connecticut
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“This book is a book of grace, beauty, blessings, and guidance for anyone wishing to expand their consciousness and their practical, as well as sacred, relationship with death, dying, and human suffering.”– Jean Watson, PhD, RN, AHN-BC, FAAN, University of Colorado College of Nursing, founder of Watson Caring Science Institute a non-profit foundation
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“In a culture which tends to avoid issues relating to death and dying, Lani Leary tackles the challenges with openness and humanity. ”– Robin L. Cowherd, director of Donor Family Services, LifeNet Health
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“Retailing Insight Review: Dr. Lani Leary couples her personal experience of her father’s terminal illness with her academic background in the field of mental health and 25 years as a working psychotherapist to bring readers No One Has to Die Alone. Her book is partly her personal story, which everyone can relate to, as a daughter losing her father. That experience is balanced out with her academic knowledge of death and dying, and how everyone involved can grow and benefit from a meaningful death of a dying loved one. This book may even inspire readers to seek professional counseling for the support they and their dying loved one deserve. Dr. Leary gently describes the importance of the relationship between the caregiver and the dying patient and lists How to Show Up for the Patient, very practical do’s and don’ts. Skillfully outlining the steps needed to care for a dying loved one, she presents additional resources, what to expect, and how to respect and honor the process of dying, a spiritual art that is slowly gaining traction again in this culture. Her valuable book is especially helpful for bereavement counseling and she divides masculine and feminine grieving and also separates children’s grief from adults’ grief. Dr. Leary’s book, which includes an appendix of resources for the family and friends of a dying loved one, proves to be a compassionate and loving spiritual guide all readers will benefit from.”– Allyson Gracie, Wellness Specialist
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“No One Has to Die Alone provides essential information to caregivers of the terminally ill. By including the topic of after-death communication (ADC) experiences, this book also offers comfort, hope, and healing for those who are grieving after their loved ones make their transition.”– Bill Guggenheim, coauthor of Hello From Heaven!
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Book Reviews
Reading Group Guide
This reading group guide for No One Has to Die Alone includes discussion questions, ideas for enhancing your book club, and a Q&A with author Lani Leary. The suggested questions are intended to help your reading group find new and interesting angles and topics for your discussion. We hope that these ideas will enrich your conversation and increase your enjoyment of the book.
Topics & Questions for Discussion
1. What was your reaction to the introductory story of the death of Lani’s mother? What deaths or losses in your life did it remind you of?
2. In chapter 1, the author contends that, “Our fears and anxieties are the barriers to compassionate care,” and that those fears stem from one’s attitudes, assumptions, lack of experience, and lack of knowledge. When in your life’s story did you feel that you could not handle some experience of death, dying, or loss? What assumptions or lack of experience impeded you?
3. “There is no one right way to die” may challenge one of your assumptions. Discuss your “ideal death” and allow each other to describe and explain their preference.
4. Chapter 4 describes different roles that a caregiver might adopt. Which role(s) are you most comfortable with? Most trained for? Which would you want to avoid or feel uncomfortable with?
5. Leary feels strongly that denial can be an appropriate coping strategy at ti see more
Topics & Questions for Discussion
1. What was your reaction to the introductory story of the death of Lani’s mother? What deaths or losses in your life did it remind you of?
2. In chapter 1, the author contends that, “Our fears and anxieties are the barriers to compassionate care,” and that those fears stem from one’s attitudes, assumptions, lack of experience, and lack of knowledge. When in your life’s story did you feel that you could not handle some experience of death, dying, or loss? What assumptions or lack of experience impeded you?
3. “There is no one right way to die” may challenge one of your assumptions. Discuss your “ideal death” and allow each other to describe and explain their preference.
4. Chapter 4 describes different roles that a caregiver might adopt. Which role(s) are you most comfortable with? Most trained for? Which would you want to avoid or feel uncomfortable with?
5. Leary feels strongly that denial can be an appropriate coping strategy at ti see more
