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Wearing of This Garment Does Not Enable You to Fly

Wearing of This Garment Does Not Enable You to Fly

101 Real Dumb Warning Labels

Illustrated by: Tim Carroll
America's famous teenage stalkers of stupidity are back! From the authors of You May Not Tie an Alligator to a Fire Hydrant, here is a collection of 101 of the dumbest product warnings you'll ever see.

The infamous 1994 McDonald's hot coffee lawsuit has spawned a veritable industry of "hot" warnings, from Kellogg's Pop-Tarts admonition that "[i]f pastry is overheated, frosting/filling can become extremely hot and could cause burns" to the Black Cat Fireworks label: "Caution: flammable. Do not put in mouth." If, on the other hand, you manage to escape the heat with a trip to the beach, be warned that a twenty-inch beach ball is "NOT a lifesaving device." Kids (and maybe even parents) might be forgiven, however, for thinking that Mr. Bubbles Body Wash for Kids of All Ages would be okay to use if they missed the warning label: "Caution. Keep out of reach of young children."

In the brave new world of technology, users frustrated by the gobbledygook of users' manuals will be relieved that their warning labels at least make sense: the Sun StarOffice End User License Agreement warns users that "software is not designed, licensed or intended for use in the design, construction, operation or maintenance of any nuclear facility," while the SGI IRIS Indigo Workstation manual tells you, "Don't dangle the mouse by its cable or throw the mouse at coworkers." And for those who just can't quite figure out what to do with some of their new purchases, this might help: "Use Gold Dial as you would ordinary soap" explains the Dial soap label.

Compiled by Jeff Koon and Andy Powell, this hilarious collection features the best contributions from the hundreds of thousands of fans of their Web sites, www.dumblaws.com and www.dumbwarnings.com, and forty-two original drawings by illustrator Tim Carroll.
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  • Free Press | 
  • 160 pages | 
  • ISBN 9781439150443 | 
  • November 2008
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You May Not Tie an Alligator to a Fire Hydrant is a collection of the 101 dumbest real federal, city, and state laws in America, compiled by Jeff Koon and Andy Powell, a couple of high school seniors with a Web site visited by hundreds of thousands of browsers every month. These laws will astonish, possibly outrage, and certainly amuse citizens everywhere. Here you will learn that forgetting to close a gate is against the law in Nevada; that flying a kite is illegal in Schaumburg, Illinois; and...
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You May Not Tie an Alligator to a Fire Hydrant is a collection of the 101 dumbest real federal, city, and state laws in America, compiled by Jeff Koon and Andy Powell, a couple of high school seniors with a Web site visited by hundreds of thousands of browsers every month. These laws will astonish, possibly outrage, and certainly amuse citizens everywhere. Here you will learn that forgetting to close a gate is against the law in Nevada; that flying a kite is illegal in Schaumburg, Illinois; and...
Read more about this book
Read more about this book

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